omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize