No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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