I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
