ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
The dick lei will go down in squad history
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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