i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
