By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
