Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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