I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Randomize
