Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
