no, he came in my armpit
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
