I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
