It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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