Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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