I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
