My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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