i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
