go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Randomize
