he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize