New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
