What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Pants 0. Shit 1.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
