he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
