Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
