I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
