Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
