Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
