Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
