how hairy? two words: wookie tits
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I got inside last night via doggy door
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Randomize
