Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
