I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
