like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
