Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
