everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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