just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
