IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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