i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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