We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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