we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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