there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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