May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
