Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
