In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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