i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
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