Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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