hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize