I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
