Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
