He asked to "fluff my boner.."
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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