Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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