So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
