I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize